Friday 10 January 2014

Nominate This Site For A Shorty Award 2014!

Yes folks, it's that time of year again when the Shorty Awards are out for the best use of social media and various other things! Someone has already been kind enough to nominate me for an award - if you've enjoyed what you've been reading thispast year then perhaps you'd be kind enough to join in too? The username you want is @alansarchives - you're very welcome to follow me on Twitter via that name too! While you can vote for me and my site in any category (music/journalist/comedian/personwhowritesfarfartoomuch) it would be useful if you continue to vote for me in the 'blogger' category - that way we stand a chance of this site doing better through the listings this year instead of having our votes split across categories. Feel free to do what you like though - and thankyou if you are kind enough to vote! The link is here:

Meanwhile here's a re-print of last year's 'Shorty Awards' questionairre for you to laugh at, complete with a half-dozen extra answers from the questions that are new for this year. By the way the quotes are slightly out of date - some of them date back to 2010 when I'd only just started on twitter and hadn't met many of my current friends yet and this website was still at it's old address so you can ignore all those. For some reason I can't change them on the 'Shorty Awards' page but never mind - the digs at politicians and references to Bingo drinking and Max singing 'New York New York' are still as true today as when these were written!

The Shorty Interview with Alan Pattinson
What is the weirdest or most inappropriate place you've ever made a social media post from?

Zigorous Three, during a holiday back to my own planet!
In what ways do you waste the most time on social media?

Filling in the new questions asked by 'The Shorty Awards' every year! Oops....
Which family member do you wish was on Facebook? Which do you wish wasn't on Facebook?

Old great-great-great-great-great-great grandad Jebediah Bingo. He could tweet about what it's like being dead.
What's the funniest celebrity tweet you saw in this past year?

David Cameron tweeting about how he was going to cut that 'ecology green cr*&' followed by how the flooding was the planet's fault, not his!
What's the wildest experience you've had via social media?

Well, there was this 1 time Bingo tweeted 'hic' +Max tweeted 'hic hic hic' and suddenly a whole hour passed by. You should have been there!
How much time you spend online?

I never go online. I'll leave you pondering how I managed to fill in this questionairre by telepathy...
What's the most annoying social media trend?

Anything David Cameron says. Because it's all lies.
Who's your role model on social media?

Bingo and Max. Who else could organise that many drunken parties or tweet along to 'New York New York'?!
What will the internet be like in 50 years?

Eh?! Speak up young man! What do you mean they still haven't improved my internet connection yet, I've been waiting since 2014...
As a parent, coach, or role model tell us: How do you use social media to help others focus on all that is good in their lives? Don't forget to submit a nomination for the #KeepGoodGoing award!

Read each 10,000 word review at www.alansalbumarchives.blogspot - and then you'll know what it's like to suffer!!! #KeepGoodGoing
How has social media improved your life?

It hasn't. My eyesight is ten times worse and I'm getting paranoid at the thought having all these people 'following' me everywhere!
What's the most memorable Snapchat you've ever received?

Well I was playing snap this one time and fell into a great conversation about how the Kings looked like the Spice Girls in drag...
Instagram, Vine or GIF?

Insta-wha? Who's Vine? And why would I want a Gorilla In Fondue set?!
How do you pronounce GIF?

Err, 'GIF'!
What are six things you could never do without?

MP3 player, CD player, casette player, record player...hmm think you're getting the idea by now. Oh and two dogs, Max and Bingo!
Why should people follow you?

Our music site at, which has more writing than a boring science text book, but far more laughs
How do you make your tweets unique?

Trust me, when you're this monkeynuts after writing a multi-billion word count site, the way you see the world is very unique!
Has Twitter changed your life? If yes, how?

Yes. This site used to be just me, my thoughts and a laptop - now it's just me, my thoughts, a laptop and various followers!
How do you imagine Twitter changing?

Multiple accounts to cope with everyone's multiple personalities.
Twitter or Facebook?

Both. Facebook for friends I know and always want in my life - Twitter for people I'll never probably meet but are glad to have in my life
What's your best tweet?

I did enjoy comparing Nick Clegg to Nelson, the fox from Mongrels. Bingodoghic does the best tweets though
What do you wish people would do more of on Twitter?

Visit my site! Only joking - I would say the community spirit on Twitter is already about as good as it can get!
What are some big Twitter faux pas?

Tweeting personal opinions when you're in a job where you're not supposed to have any (politicians especially). Lucky no one knows me!
Who do you admire most for his or her use of Twitter?

@VelaDeadRaven is always cool, @Bingodoghic is always drunk, 4waysite has impeccable music taste and EmmaPne has a great chronic fatigue blog
Who is the funniest person on Twitter that you follow?

@VelaDeadRaven @bingodoghic (when he's not too drunk to forget his password!) and @ewokninjas, for that surreal in-joke factor
How do you use Twitter in your professional life?

By plugging my site. Endlessly. Remember folks, it's
Why should we vote for you?

Because I'm plugging my site, hang on, because if you share a passion for 1960s and 70s music I can help with your symptoms
Ever get called out for tweeting too much?

No, luckily that illness is easily tweeted! (Groan!)
140 characters of advice for a new user?

Remember that you'll always always always always always always always always use more letters than you think you are actually going to nee-
What's the most interesting connection you've made through Twitter?

NutTheSquirrel - it isn't everyday you get to chat to a beanie squirrel. I'm beginning to think Queen_UK isn't really the queen...
Who do you wish had a Twitter feed but doesn't?

Hundreds of musicians, I'd love to see CSNY on here and Dr Who, but then he's a bit busy saving the world from destruction every day to tweet
Can you name some one-of-a-kind Twitter accounts that you follow?

SontaronPR is pretty special - I always wondered what a Sontaron thought about when taking over the world. And @bingodoghic is unique too!
Terms you wish would start trending on Twitter right now?

#alansalbumarchives, #Cameronmustgo #TheQueenhasabdicated, #CSNYatnumberone, #TheFaceOfBoHasWonTheLottery, #BingoIsSober, #Maxhaslosthisvoice
Have you ever unfollowed someone? Who and why?

Only by accident. The more to follow the merrier in my view.
How will the world change in the next year?

Aliens will start tweeting their own messages from the planet Zigorous Three+all the 'April 1st' editions of my website will be proved right!
What question are we not asking here that we should?

What was the address of that marvellous website again? Why its, thanksforasking!
What was the funniest trend you've seen?

Queen_UK's tweet about Prince Charles getting a plastic crown in his cracker last year...
Is there someone you want to follow you who doesn't already? If so, who?

Everyone! And get visiting my site while you're about it: it's, visit us now!
What inspires you to tweet?

Music, madness, insanity, insincerity, injustice, inhumanity and daily events in my life that are so random I just have to share them
What are some words or phrases you refuse to shorten for brevity?

discombobulate, Simon and Garfunkel, Belle and Sebastian, Max The Singing Dog
How long can you go without a tweet?

I can manage...erm..ahh...umm...HELP! it's been too long! Stop asking me questions and let me tweet! I take it back - this is untweetable!
How do you decide what to tweet?

I take a long slow lazy look through the inner workings of my mind, fall asleep, turn on the telly and steal something funny by somebody else
What will the world be like 10 years from now?

Like it is now, but with no Coalition or Royal Family, more music websites and singing dogs with canes and contact from aliens on Zigorous 3
What is one of the biggest misconceptions of Twitter?

That it's a waste of time. Like 99% of our lives isn't anyway?!
Hashtag you created that you wish everyone used?

#alansalbumarchivesisgreat, #bingoisdrunkagain, #wakemeupwhenthecoalitionisover
What feature should Twitter add?

A link to my website - it's Wait, did I already mention that?!
Why'd you start tweeting?

To plug my website ( That and to keep an eye on what Bingo tweets when he is drunk!

A NOW COMPLETE List Of Top Five/Top Ten/TOP TWENTY  Entries 2008-2019
1) Chronic Fatigue songs

2) Songs For The Face Of Bo

3) Credit Crunch Songs

4) Songs For The Autumn

5) National Wombat Week

6) AAA Box Sets

7) Virus Songs

8) Worst AAA-Related DVDs

9) Self-Punctuating Superstar Classics

10) Ways To Know You Have Turned Into A Collector

11) Political Songs

12) Totally Bonkers Concept Albums

13) Celebrating 40 Years Of The Beatles' White Album

14) Still Celebrating 40 Years Of The Beatles' White Album

15) AAA Existential Questions

16) Releases Of The Year 2008

17) Top AAA Xmas Songs

18) Notable AAA Gigs

19) All things '20' related for our 20th issue

20) Romantic odes for Valentine's Day

21) Hollies B sides

22) 'Other' BBC Session Albums

23) Beach Boys Rarities Still Not Available On CD

24) Songs John, Paul and George wrote for Ringo's solo albums

25) 5 of the Best Rock 'n' Roll Tracks From The Pre-Beatles Era

26) AAA Autobiographies

27) Rolling Stones B-sides

28) Beatles B-Sides

29) The lllloooonnngggeesssttt AAA songs of all time

30) Kinks B-Sides

31) Abandoned CSNY projects 'wasted on the way'

32) Best AAA Rarities and Outtakes Sets

33) News We've Missed While We've Been Away

34) Birthday Songs for our 1st Anniversary

35) Brightest Album Covers

36) Biggest Recorded Arguments

37) Songs About Superheroes

38) AAA TV Networks That Should Exist

39) AAA Woodtsock Moments

40) Top Moments Of The Past Year As Voted For By Readers

41) Music Segues

42) AAA Foreign Language Songs

43) 'Other' Groups In Need Of Re-Mastering

44) The Kinks Preservation Rock Opera - Was It Really About The Forthcoming UK General Election?

45) Mono and Stereo Mixes - Biggest Differences

46) Weirdest Things To Do When A Band Member Leaves

47) Video Clips Exclusive To Youtube (#1)

48) Top AAA Releases Of 2009

49) Songs About Trains

50) Songs about Winter

51) Songs about astrology plus horoscopes for selected AAA members

52) The Worst Five Groups Ever!

53) The Most Over-Rated AAA Albums

54) Top AAA Rarities Exclusive To EPs

55) Random Recent Purchases (#1)

56) AAA Party Political Slogans

57) Songs To Celebrate 'Rock Sunday'

58) Strange But True (?) AAA Ghost Stories

59) AAA Artists In Song

60) Songs About Dogs

61) Sunshiney Songs

62) The AAA Staff Play Their Own Version Of Monoploy/Mornington Crescent!

63) What 'Other' British Invasion DVDs We'd Like To See

64) What We Want To Place In Our AAA Time Capsule

65) AAA Conspiracy Theroies

66) Weirdest Things To Do Before - And After - Becoming A Star

67) Songs To Tweet To

68) Greatest Ever AAA Solos

69) John Lennon Musical Tributes

70) Songs For Halloween

71) Earliest Examples Of Psychedelia

72) Purely Instrumental Albums

73) AAA Utopias

74) AAA Imaginary Bands

75) Unexpected AAA Cover Versions

76) Top Releases of 2010

77) Songs About Snow

78) Predictions For 2011

79) AAA Fugitives

80) AAA Home Towns

81) The Biggest Non-Musical Influences On The 1960s

82) AAA Groups Covering Other AAA Groups

83) Strange Censorship Decisions

84) AAA Albums Still Unreleased on CD

85) Random Recent Purchases (#2)

86) Top AAA Music Videos

87) 30 Day Facebook Music Challenge

88) AAA Documentaries

89) Unfinished and 'Lost' AAA Albums

90) Strangest AAA Album Covers

91) AAA Performers Live From Mars (!)

92) Songs Including The Number '100' for our 100th Issue

93) Most Songs Recorded In A Single Day

94) Most Revealing AAA Interviews

95) Top 10 Pre-Fame Recordings

96) The Shortest And Longest AAA Albums

97) The AAA Allstars Ultimate Band Line-Up

98) Top Songs About Sports

99) AAA Conversations With God

100) AAA Managers: The Good, The Bad and the Financially Ugly

101) Unexpected AAA Cameos

102) AAA Words You can Type Into A Caluclator

103) AAA Court Cases

104) Postmodern Songs About Songwriting

105) Biggest Stylistic Leaps Between Albums

106) 20 Reasons Why Cameron Should Go!

107) The AAA Pun-Filled Cookbook

108) Classic Debut Releases

109) Five Uses Of Bird Sound Effects

110) AAA Classic Youtube Clips Part #1

111) Part #2

112) Part #3

113) AAA Facts You Might Not Know

114) The 20 Rarest AAA Records

115) AAA Instrumental Songs

116) Musical Tarot

117) Christmas Carols

118) Top AAA Releases Of 2011

119) AAA Bands In The Beano/The Dandy

120) Top 20 Guitarists #1

121) #2

122) 'Shorty' Nomination Award Questionairre

123) Top Best-Selling AAA Albums

124) AAA Songs Featuring Bagpipes

125) A (Hopefully) Complete List Of AAA Musicians On Twitter

126) Beatles Albums That Might Have Been 1970-74 and 1980

127) DVD/Computer Games We've Just Invented

128) The AAA Albums With The Most Weeks At #1 in the UK

129) The AAA Singles With The Most Weeks At #1 in the UK

130) Lyric Competition (Questions)

131) Top Crooning Classics

132) Funeral Songs

133) AAA Songs For When Your Phone Is On Hold

134) Random Recent Purchases (#3)

135) Lyric Competition (Answers)

136) Bee Gees Songs/AAA Goes Disco!

137) The Best AAA Sleevenotes (And Worst)

138) A Short Precise Of The Years 1962-70

139) More Wacky AAA-Related Films And Their Soundtracks

140) AAA Appearances On Desert Island Discs

141) Songs Exclusive To Live Albums

142) More AAA Songs About Armageddon

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Following on from last issue’s study of the American Billboard charts, here’s a look at which AAA albums spent the most weeks on the chart. The...

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Naturally we hold our AAA bands in high esteem in these articles: after all, without their good taste, intelligence and humanity we’d have nothing to...

What do you do when you’ve left a multi-million selling band and yet you still feel the pull of the road and the tours and the playing to audiences...

‘The ATOS Song’ (You’re Not Fit To Live)’ (Mini-Review) Dear readers, we don’t often feature reviews of singles over albums or musicians who aren’t...

In honour of this week’s review of an album released to cash in on a movie soundtrack (only one of these songs actually appears in ‘Easy Rider’...and...

Hic! Everyone raise a glass to the rock stars of the past and to this week’s feature...songs about alcolholic beverages! Yes that’s right, everything...

154) The human singing voice carries with it a vast array of emotions, thoughts that cannot be expressed in any other way except opening the lungs and...

Everyone has a spiritual home, even if they don’t actually live there. Mine is in a windy, rainy city where the weather is always awful but the...

Having a family does funny things to some musicians, as we’ve already seen in this week’s review (surely the only AAA album actually written around...

Some artists just have no idea what their best work really is. One thing that amazes me as a collector is how consistently excellent many of the...

159) A (Not That) Short Guide To The 15 Best Non-AAA Bands

160) The Greatest AAA Drum Solos (Or Near Solos!)

161) AAA Rock ‘n’ Roll Hall Of Fame Acceptance Speeches

162) AAA Re-Recordings Of Past Songs

163) A Coalition Christmas (A Fairy Tale)

164) AAA Songs About Islands

165) The AAA Review Of The Year 2012

166) The Best AAA Concerts I Attended

167) Tributes To The 10 AAA Stars Who Died The Youngest

168) The First 10 AAA Songs Listed Alphabetically

171) The 10 Best Songs From The Psychedelia Box-Sets ‘Nuggets’ and ‘Nuggets Two’

172) The 20 Most Common Girl’s Names In AAA Song Titles (With Definitions) 

180) First Recordings By Future AAA Stars

185) A Tribute To Storm Thorgerson Via The Five AAA Bands He Worked With

188) Surprise! Celebrating 300 Album Reviews With The Biggest 'Surprises' Of The Past Five Years Of Alan's Album Archives!

190) Comparatively Obscure First Compositions By AAA Stars

193) Evolution Of A Band: Comparing First Lyric With Last Lyric:

200) The Monkees In Relation To Postmodernism (University Dissertation)

202) Carly Simon's 'You're So Vain': Was It About One Of The AAA Crew?

217) AAA 'Christmas Presents' we'd most like to have next year

221) Dr Who and the AAA (Five Musical Links)

222) Five Random Recent Purchases

223) AAA Grammy Nominees

224) Ten AAA songs that are better heard unedited and in full

225) The shortest gaps between AAA albums

226) The longest gaps between AAA albums

227) Top ten AAA drummers

228) Top Ten AAA Singles (In Terms of 'A' and 'B' Sides)

229) The Stories Behind Six AAA Logos

230) AAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!! The Best Ten AAA Screams

231) An AAA Pack Of Horses

232) AAA Granamas - Sorry, Anagrams!

233) AAA Surnames and Their Meanings

234) 20 Erroneous AAA Album Titles

235) The Best AAA Orchestral Arrangements

236) Top 30 Hilariously Misheard Album Titles/Lyrics

237) Ten controversial AAA sackings - and whether they were right

238) A Critique On Critiquing - In Response To Brian Wilson

239) The Ten MusicianS Who've Played On The Most AAA Albums

240) Thoughts on #CameronMustGo

241) Random Recent Purchases (Kinks/Grateful Dead/Nils Lofgren/Rolling Stones/Hollies) 

242) AAA Christmas Number Ones 

243) AAA Review Of The Year 2014 (Top Releases/Re-issues/Documentaries/DVDs/Books/Songs/ Articles  plus worst releases of the year)

244) Me/CFS Awareness Week 2015

245) Why The Tory 2015 Victory Seems A Little...Suspicious

246) A Plea For Peace and Tolerance After The Attacks on Paris - and Syria

247) AAA Review Of The Year 2015

248) The Fifty Most Read AAA Articles (as of December 31st 2015)

249) The Revised AAA Crossword!

251) Half-A-Dozen Berries Plus One (An AAA Tribute To Chuck Berry)

252) Guest Post: ‘The Skids – Joy’ (1981) by Kenny Brown

254) Guest Post: ‘Supertramp – Some Things Never Change’ by Kenny Brown

255) AAA Review Of The Year 2018

256) AAA Review Of The Year 2019 plus Review Of The Decade 2010-2019

257) Tiermaker

258) #Coronastock

259) #Coronadocstock